Lesbian Dating Cycle: Which Phase Are You In?
Essential Lesbian Dating Cycle Phase Assessment for Finding Your Other Half.
It will take you 30 seconds to self-identify.
👀 Les-Be-Honest with yourself! 🤣
Phase 0️⃣ A. Lesbian Ex Stupidity or B. Healing A Broken Heart
(A: Aka talking to your ex, You Big Dumbie…No judgement, we all did it until we healed it. *May not apply if you share offspring together, but for most of you…Step into your power, and cut the crap. It didn’t work before, it won’t work now. There is better for you on the horizon IF you truly let go!
Or B: you are completely stuck in the depths of despair of lesbian heartbreak, which is arguably the worst kind of heartbreak. You only heal when you decide to get up off the floor and choose YOURSELF before you can choose another human.
I highly recommend not wasting time on someone who doesn’t deserve you to begin with, and start healing. But don’t be silly and think you will wake up one day and feel magically “Healed.” The healing is “the moving on,” your healing is acceptance, your healing is choosing your future over wishing for a past that no longer exists and never will.
Here is a playlist I created with my own music inside, written to help you heal and move on. Only you can decide you are done wallowing and start living again. Your future holds your Future Wife, but if you don’t get out of Phase 0 and bravely step into Phase 1 again, you are blocking yourself from love.)
Phase 1️⃣ Single And Ready to Mingle
(Completely, radically single as a Pringle, Baby! You aren’t trying to find someone just like your ex. You are “doing the work” to be the best, healthiest version of you…And that open heart looks hot on you!)
Phase 2️⃣ Early Talking (Talking Phase A)
(In this baby talking phase, y’all just slid into the DMs or just got matched on my lesbian dating platform, The Queer Country Club™…Ooooh how exciting! Do you share mutual values? Is this someone you want to invest time into getting to know on a deeper level? I love that in The Queer Country Club™, we value sharing WHO we are and our values in the “Dear Future Wife” Thread, so when someone messages you, it’s not just a surface-level connection based on looks alone, and they already know a lot about you and what you are looking for.)
Phase 3️⃣ Making Plans To Meet (Talking Phase B)
(Who is going to step up and make a plan to meet in the real world? Once you meet IRL, you will know if you want to keep talking after you assess someone’s mannerisms and if you are attracted to them.)
Phase 4️⃣ Just Met IRL (Talking Phase C)
(Well, the awkward part is over…unless it is over…and then you have to break the news gently and set a “there’s no spark” boundary. Or it went so well, your lesbian first date could have lasted a couple days! You know how that goes…)
Phase 5️⃣ Waiting to Make it Official
(Some lesbians skip this phase after one date, HAH! But for others, this phase can be so uncomfy, yet so sexy! Just talk it out together face to face. If you started your relationship off with a firm foundation of open and honest communication, don’t be shy about asking to make it official, especially if it’s been a couple of months! If there are constant excuses to not make it “offiicial,” you are sadly with someone who wants a situationship, and you need to reassess if that’s not what you want.)
Phase 6️⃣ Officially Committed
(What a relief! Now making plans for little romantic getaways together, or meshing together weekend plans is just a part of life. She has a drawer at your house, and you keep her favorite mug in your cupboard.)
Phase 7️⃣ Secure Dating Uhaul Energy
(Ah, it feels so good to be settled in and enjoying life together. At this point, you may live together or not, but you are both happy with where you are…cuddled up in each other’s arms...and thighs!)
Phase 8️⃣ Wife for Life Partnership
(No relationship is perfect, but the feeling of emotional safety is unmatched! This IS undoubtedly your person. You are both equally committed to a future together, with or without an official marriage proposal, and you can’t imagine a future without each other. You found “The One.”)
👋If we haven’t officially met before, hi, I’m Sophia Spallino, the lesbian founder of the premiere wlw dating platform, The Queer Country Club™. I created this space for queer womxn like us. ♥️
If you took that quiz, and feel at any point in your life any of phases 2 through 7 feels wonky, you should reassess and maybe start fresh!
Dating again after a breakup can be hard, but my dating platform will be there to help you get back into dating womxn who are dating for the same reasons you are…to eventually find your phase 8 kind of love, your life partner.
What’s The Queer Country Club™ like? Is it a regular dating app?
NOPE! It’s a cross between a dating platform, social country club, and online community of queer womxn seeking their one true life partner...that includes live mixers, coaching, and virtual matching! 😍
